my name is bill and i'm a headcase

1 year ago (26 notes)

#CRYING
#Jean-Ralphio Saperstein
#this article omg lolll
#parks and recreation
#GQ
#ben schwartz

GQ: After successfully crossing said puddle, you continue walking down the street until, all of a sudden, you encounter Drake exiting a limo. How do you introduce yourself?
Jean-Ralphio: “D to the R to the A-K-E. / It’s me J.R., do you want some tea…cups.”
GQ: The bouncer at a high-end nightclub proclaims loudly—within earshot of your female companion(s)—that you are not on the list. How do you get into the club anyway?
Jean-Ralphio: First off, I would be worried about his vision. I mean, he’s gotta be blind because we are DEFINITELY on that list. If he is, in fact, blind, I would apologize, then explain that my man Drake is waiting for me inside and I need to get in there to give him these tea cups we were rapping about earlier.

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GQ: After successfully crossing said puddle, you continue walking down the street until, all of a sudden, you encounter Drake exiting a limo. How do you introduce yourself?

Jean-Ralphio: “D to the R to the A-K-E. / It’s me J.R., do you want some tea…cups.”

GQ: The bouncer at a high-end nightclub proclaims loudly—within earshot of your female companion(s)—that you are not on the list. How do you get into the club anyway?

Jean-Ralphio: First off, I would be worried about his vision. I mean, he’s gotta be blind because we are DEFINITELY on that list. If he is, in fact, blind, I would apologize, then explain that my man Drake is waiting for me inside and I need to get in there to give him these tea cups we were rapping about earlier.